I love my wife

I have heard that the first year of marriage is the hardest. Well if this is as hard as it gets....... I so love my wife. She is a true gift from God. I just pray I could be as good to her as she is to me. Some may wonder why so many facebook affirmations to Angela Braan. Well, I know who she is to me and sincerly love her. We have had our ups and downs, and still only the love of Christ can be compared. She loves me unconditionally (even though I make the dumbest mistakes sometimes). She takes care of the things I overlook. She has my back through thick and thin. I have never seen a woman built like her. She is a jewel worth far more than rubies. We laugh together, we cry together, we pray together, we worship together. I truly love this woman. She covers my shortcomings and magnifies my stregnths. This woman has Proverbs 31, Ephesians 5 and you name it written all over her. She is my queen. I love you so much baby...

Seeking Him

This morning I told God that I was upset with myself and Him. I sometimes feel like all I see is trial. I do so much for others and still face trial after trial. It sometimes feels like whatever victories I see are reciprocated by another fight. I know God has more for me. I realize today that I am more than a conqueror. And that God has trusted me with this trial to somehow bring Him glory, but I have always believed that. As I prayed this scripture set in and conviction fell.

Hebrews 11:6

But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of him that dilligently seek him.

It is so easy to lose sight of God and focus on whats going on around you. Peter had this same fight while walking on water. While in pursuit of the Savior he was distracted by the waves. I caught myself doing this. When trial comes I fight for the solution of the issue. Instead of continually seeking God and what He is saying in the storm, I immediatly go into problem solving and without realising it at first I have abandoned my pursuit for God and began to chase the issue. Last night I ran into a friend from highschool and out of all we talked about one thing remained in my head, "when you focus on taking care of God's business, He will take care of yours".

I also see now why my light has been so dim. When what you focus on is the issues of life, then your pursuit of God begins to suffer. When your pursuit suffers, your relationship with Him suffers. When we spend more time with the varying vicissitudes of life than we do with God, we have become engaged in a battle that doesn't even belong to us. We carry the burden of our issues and not the burden God has intended for us.

Matthew 11:28-30

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I wil give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Jesus tells us that his burden is light. Light is the truth. The only thing Christ wanted us to carry was the truth. That same truth that would make men free. That same truth that would make us the light (illumination) of the world. So easily we forget that Christ has already conquered the world and we take on this fight, as if we have to reconquer it. Instead our intent should be to take His yoke upon us, learn (dilligently seek) of Him. There are so many scriptures that come to mind right now that make this same point. Matthew 6:33 for one says. "seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you. One thing that God has been faithfull to do is provide protection and security for His people. All we have to do is seek Him.....

Leadership can be lonely

Leadership can be lonely. You're the one with the mandate while those who are set to follow you have the opinions. It's lonely when those around you can't understand your passion, when they don't see the vision, or they just simply choose to resist. But this does not change what God has told you to do. Follow the vision God has given you. Lead with the mandate on your life and the Holy Spirit will be the only company you need. Leadership is ultimately followship. One who is leading must also be following that which is leading him. Jesus did all he did on earth under the direction of the Father in heaven. The lives of those who follow you are at steak. Either you lead them into the promised place of God, or their blood is on your hands. Ezekiel 33 makes this plain. Stop looking for the approval of man. When you strecth people they don't like it, that is until they can begin to see the benefit of the process. Some will hang in there, some will fall away. Bible says anyone who puts his hand to the plow and then turns away is not worthy of the kingdom. Don't get weary in your well doing. God has not gone blind to battle you face. He knew about it before you did. He allowed you to see it in order to develop the character needed for your next assignment. Get it here, you will need it later. Those who are following you are somewhere in your process. Be sensitive to this. They also are dealing with a great deal. Have the same compassion that Christ does in regards to you. When leading people you are privy to see things in them that they have no idea they are showing you. It is partly your responsibilty to lead them out of their bondage the Holy Spirit will do what you are not required to. In order to lead someone out of their bondage you must be free. You must be free from people. You need to be free from yourself. Leaders will make more leaders. Don't be afraid to pour into someone. You may very well be their training ground. Those whom you lead must be able to follow a clear example. I've learned the hard way that when your people "SEE" you fall, its very difficult to gain that trust back. Tansparency is important. But because you are to be transparent you have to be very mindful of what people see. This requires you to live right "ON PURPOSE". Even what you do in the dark will one day be exposed. Don't play with the call on your life. God was not playing when He intentionally put it on you.